Halloween Dinner

It's Halloween and the kids love it, of course. Early on I started a tradition of making a creative meal on this night. Honestly I am not sure why I chose to make such a big deal of it. I have my opinions of how big a deal Halloween is to people over Christmas but I won't go into that now.

So, in years past I have done foods like hard boiled egg blood shot eyes, stuffed bread snakes, tomato juice blood, grilled hot dog worms worms, cookie & ice cream cone witches hats, hot dog mummies, deviled eggs, olive eyes, pretzel ghosts--just to name a few. some have gone over better than others. Cranberry juice called blood goes over a lot better than tomato juice as blood. "Ghoul"ash is never a hit with my children although I am quite fond of it.

This year we were a little short on cash and I didn't plan in advance so it was up to me to come up with something from our very small pantry. I was feeling very guilty that I couldn't give them some of the favorites. It caused me to get really creative this time.

Don't ask why but I had a packet of lemonade kool aid (so not me) and so I made that up and threw in some green food coloring (again not me) and...Voila! Green slime drink.

(I am so embarrassed. The things I served my family tonight are really quite gross and so obviously against my organic beliefs. I shall now have to detox my family from sugar, dyes, chemicals, gross meats and so on. But I shall pocket my pride and continue.)

I also had a packet of Jello which actually required a lot of thinking but I finally decided on making jigglers cut with Halloween cookie cutters. My daughter saw it and said it was witches blood. The blood kind of turned into a lightly congealed, soupy blood but it was the first thing eaten. We had some little smokies that we turned into worms served with ketchup blood (lots of blood tonight). Tomato soup turned into a warm blood drink. We had (organic) green pea baby aliens. Plus we had some (organic)sweet potato pumpkin guts.

The piece de resistance was dessert. Pus with scabs, blood and dirt. I was quite proud of myself with this one. Very ingenious of me. It was vanilla pudding with a chocolate rice cereal, crushed Heath bars and dried cranberries. I thought it was an excellent dessert that all would love.

An overall "gross" meal if I do say so myself. My children loved it! Or they loved the idea of it! They didn't go for the warm blood. And believe or not, one of them would not touch the pus! And he doesn't even know what puss really is! They didn't eat everything but I think they were happy with it. The girls actually said it was the best Halloween dinner ever.

So what do I know. This again just shows me that I really don't have a clue about what is best for me and my family sometimes--no, most of the time. God had a plan which was not my plan and it all worked out for good. I was able to get creative and try new things. I didn't get to do what I wanted but I made due with what we had. And it was great. Once again proving to me and hopefully to you too that GOD IS GOOD!

Music or Art-which touches your heart?

I was sitting in church today listening to the sermon--mind you I am not sure I remember the real point of it, I might remember later--and Dr. Haney said something about appreciating art. How overwhelmed with feelings he gets looking at beautiful art. I on the other hand just get overwhelmed.

I am not an art gallery type person. It really doesn't interest me. I am also not a museum person. Although the kids and I did go to an exhibit of photographer Chuck Close and it was great. I could stare at his photo for a while. But generally art is not my thing. I appreciate talent and have a few friends that are artists that I really like their work but it doesn't move me.

But Music! Music on the other hand can make me cry in a heartbeat. I didn't cry today but boy Paul Sanchez was amazing. I did feel like he could have done more with the song though. It seemed like he held back or was held back. right when he could have blown me away...bam...the song went soft and it was over. Anyway, I digress. He is awesome but I want more.

Two weeks ago we had some local artists from Austin come and oh, my goodness. Carolyn Wonderland, Guy Forsythe and Shelly King and wow, they didn't hold back. It was amazing. I was moved by their music. They made me feel alive listening to their music. I didn't want it to end. I wanted to go back to the next service and listen all over again.

I cry every time Steve Morris sings. He is amazing and so humble. The last time he sang was when he performed "So much to be Thankful for". It was great. The whole church loves him. I love it when he sings the more operatic pieces. I can't wait until he sings again. The kids choir will be singing with him in December. I told my kids they get to hear my favorite singer!

There are other worship songs that we sing that affect me too. Like "Amazing Grace" and "Great is Thy Faithfulness". I can't remember all of them. I really do hear God in these songs and really feel like I can praise Him. And even when I'm not at church I love listening to music.

Check out some of these songs and artists I mentioned.

Light Bulb Moment!

So my post yesterday got me to thinking. And I think I have realized something very important.

Accidental cleaning. Cleaning when you have no choice but to clean. I started to think about other parts of my life. Like, say, the car. We don't do any regular maintenance on the cars other than oil changes. We just wait until something happens and then we work on the car. Repair when you have no choice but to repair.

Or for me, going to the doctor. I don't have yearly physicals and I haven't had a womanly check up in 2 years. There are a lot of reasons but the overwhelming reason is that I wait until I am sick or have an urgent need. Wait until something feels bad and then go to the doctor. Go to the doctor when you have no choice but to go.

Yikes! It extends to other parts of my life to...working on myself when the pain gets too bad, to doing assignments at the last minute. Wow! I am amazed at this pattern. I am not sure what I am going to do about it but awareness is half the battle. Thanks for letting me ramble...

Don't cry over Spilled Apple Juice!

Saturday we were getting ready to go to our morning meeting when we had a small crisis at our house!

I was vacuuming (anyone who knows me should be proud) and turned the vacuum off for a second when I heard my husband calmly saying I needed to come out and help him because a bottle of juice had spilled. Well, if you do know me you probably know that I try not to buy a lot of plastic so it was a GLASS bottle and it didn't just spill--it SHATTERED! And of course being the thrifty shopper that I am, it wasn't a small bottle it was a HALF GALLON bottle! And on top of it all, it was apple juice-totally sticky and liquidy!!!

It was one of those times that I call accidental cleaning. We really needed to mop the floor in the kitchen and we really needed to pull out the fridge to clean under and behind it. I actually had been thinking about it recently--I hadn't done anything but I did think about it. So we had glass & juice everywhere. The kids were banished to get shoes on and to keep out of the kitchen. We went to work picking up pieces of glass, sopping up the juice--oh, and here's where the fun started--we ran out of paper towels! I had none. So we used old cheap napkins and then we used nice Vanity Fair dinner napkins. It was ridiculous, really.

Then he mopped...with my husband's industrial sized restaurant mop and bucket--a little overboard but typical male thing to do (and buy). This is my husband's motto "If more is good, a lot is better then too much is just enough! And it applies for mops also. After it dried we swept. Then we left. We had to take a break before the dreaded refrigerator!!!

So we pulled out the fridge--a little scary! Things had fallen down beside it so that was kind of gross. I guess that could have been my 27 Fling Boogie for Fly Lady! I didn't even try to clean the things up jut threw them away. We hadn't really missed them so why keep them. To be honest the fridge wasn't that bad. I cleaned under it and we vacuumed the dust off the coils so now we're good to go for a while:)

Accidental cleaning! The times when an accident occurs which prompts a thorough cleaning when you hadn't planned it but it needed to be done.

So even what appears to be a bad thing turns into a good thing--an actual blessing. I am grateful that the juice spilled because it got my husband and I to clean something that we had been putting off. Plus we did it together! Hooray! AND...the biggest miracle of all...NO YELLING!

Once again God is good and His plans for us are good even when it doesn't look like it.

Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you,"declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Memories...

I grew up in upstate New York and people are always shocked when I say that I have never been to New York City. I don't know why I've never been...funny.

Anyway, we did spend a lot of time in Canada. My mother's siblings live around Toronto and my grandmother's family had a place north of Toronto that we traveled to during the Summer. lots of different memories come to mind. I couldn't share them all in this one post but maybe I can share a few.

My aunt was/is a wonderful cook and always had/has lots of good food around. In general, most of my memories of growing up are around food. I am always trying to capture the past by having the same types of food we had when I was a kid--ask my poor husband about what i make him eat:)

As I was saying, I love to eat at my Aunt's. One of my favorite things was a tomato sandwich--white bread, tomato, lettuce and mayonnaise. So simple but incredible. And we used to eat them outside by the pool. That was fun. They had incredible pantries and freezers full of food. Another thing was a rice krispy treat ice cream sandwich. I think it was a peanut butter bar with strawberry ice cream--at least that's how I remember it. Once time she made homemade caramel pop corn. I could not stop eating it! At Christmas, she made all kinds of cookies. My mother's favorite was fruitcake cookies (yuck!). But my favorite was a meringue cookie! Yum! There were all kinds of family recipe cookies too. One Christmas, Aunt Sari made Seafood Newburg for dinner and we sat around the table eating dessert for what seemed like hours after. I was sick. I had to go lay down and I don't think I got up until the next morning.

One of the things we still laugh about and regularly wish we could still eat is cheesecake! And not your usual homemade cheesecake--thick, tall New York style with a layer of sour cream on top. There were other flavors too but I don't remember those. I do remember the berries that were plentiful on the table. But here's the interesting part...it was not for dessert...THE CHEESECAKE WAS FOR BREAKFAST!!! That's right, breakfast!!!! How awesome was that. I wouldn't dare eating that much dairy or that many calories at breakfast these days but the memory is there and it's great.

The last time I was at their house was for their oldest daughter's wedding. Now my Aunt did not prepare the food but I know she had a part in choosing it. And it was incredible...a seafood buffet. Seafood gets me every time. In Canada, a tradition is to have a wedding cake but it is a fruitcake type and it is cut up and wrapped in little pieces for the guests to take home. So because of that, at this wedding they also had a very large dessert table. It was amazing.

So there, now you know my slight obsession with food. And how it ties in with my memories. It's fun to think back. I just have to make sure that I am not living in the past and that I stay in the present and make my own memories with my kids and maybe a little bit of food...

Crying children...

I was going to write but I have crying and screaming children in the background. Do you feel sorry for me? No, I didn't think so. I wish I knew how not to react...

Wow! Time Flies!

So, it's been a LONG time since I posted. To tell you the truth, it wasn't that I didn't think I had anything to say, I just lost my desire. Let me tell you about it.

I really enjoy writing. I feel like I have a lot to say. I was really finding this quite the excellent outlet for my thoughts. I also found that I was able to share them without any judgement which is pretty remarkable because in my mind I still find that I think I know the right way to do everything:) I am generally a pretty reserved and keep to myself. But I long to be an extrovert who is always bubbly and positive like many of my friends--who know who they are! I secretly-or maybe not so secretly- love to be in the limelight and have all the attention on me. So I think this kind of fulfilled my inner Celebrity!

The problem is the little voice in my head that is constantly berating everything I do. This happens on a regular basis. I start doing something good for myself or something that I like or I relax a little bit and WHAM! the loud, little voice has got my attention. I start questioning and then the next thing you know I don't want to do whatever the good thing was. In AA, we would call that voice our disease. I think Beth Moore (my favorite Bible study author and teacher) would call it the Devil or the Enemy. Others may call it the voice of doubt. Whatever it is, I listen to it too much.

So, what can I do about it? Pray to God is number one and ask Him to remove my doubts and the negative thoughts I have. I can get support from other people who go through this. I can feel the fear and do it anyway. The other thing that I think would help is to have a routine or discipline at least with writing, so that at some point it becomes wrote (literally and figuratively).

I want to thank Mike Robertson for giving my the push that I needed to write here again. Thanks for taking the time to encourage me. I appreciate your positive words.

My Favorite Crock Pot Recipe!

I wish I could make all our dinners in the Crock Pot! The problem is our children and our dietary restrictions make it difficult to find recipes. So here's one the kids will sometimes eat.

Hamburger Casserole (from the Rival Crock-Ette Slow Cooker Manual)

I have adapted this recipe and added some things.

3 potatoes (sliced)

3 carrots (sliced)

1 can corn (drained) or a cup of frozen corn

1 can peas (drained) or a cup of frozen peas

2 onions (sliced)

2 stalks of celery (sliced)

1 1/2 lbs. Ground Beef (browned)

1 can tomato soup

1 can water

Place layers of vegetables in Slow Cooker in order given. Season with salt and pepper. Place ground beef on top. Mix soup and water. Pour soup mixture over top. 16 ounces of Tomato sauce can be substituted for soup and water.

I don't measure the vegetables. I just make sure there is a layer of each item.

Cover and Cook on Low 8 to 10 hours

I hope you all enjoy it. My mother made it when I was a kid although she doesn't remember:)

Breathe

I am coming up for air after months of preparation for and the execution of Vacation Bible School at our church. The Nu Yu Network made it's premier and hundreds of children were taught about the miracles of Jesus. It was a booming success!

We talk about breathing a lot in my home. We have one daughter who is, for lack of better words, a "mouth breather". We are constantly reminding her to breathe through her nose while she is eating. It is a tough battle.

But when I remind her to breathe it is a clue for me to breathe. I tend to hold my breathe and then have to take deep breathes which make it sound like there is something wrong with me--sighing like I am totally depressed! So that is another clue to me to breath. I don't know if it's a stress thing--what am I saying of course it is! It doesn't really matter. I know I just need to get still and breathe.

I also tend to go, go, go. So I need to take some time and sit and be still. Awareness is half the battle. I have known for a LONG time that I need to do this and haven't. I am too busy and tired...Ha!

Here's a bible verse that will help.

Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10

Here's some lyrics from a song that I love.

Let every thing that, every thing that, every thing that has breath praise the Lord.

Check out this song by Pearl Jam called Just Breathe (Eddie's singing about God!)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kuq7RYQ8Wa0

God is Good! All the time.

Okay, so yesterday we were going to take it easy before the big Vacation Bible School week. We did our usual Saturday morning routine--bath the kids, cut the grass and then we went to our favorite AA meeting. We were on on our way back and almost home when our oldest says "we could go eat free Poke jo's BBQ at that thing". That thing was the grand opening of a credit union in our neighborhood. We debated for a minute-my husband wanted to go home and eat pb&j! But we decided we would drive by and see how crowded it was. For some reason we stayed even though we had to park in an adjacent parking lot. Let me tell you that that is not like us...we don't like to work hard at things.

So we walk over and decide to get food first because we are all starving at 12:30pm. We sat down and observed. We ate our free lunch which was quite good I might add--yummy potato salad. Then we had a free water ice--also very good--from Jim Jim's. We noticed that some people were getting a chance to stand in this inflatable play bank vault. So we watched and watched. Then we decided we needed to go do some activities because we had to get my husband to a hair appointment. So we goo spin a wheel for a chance to win prizes. On the wheel it says "cash vault". So now we know how we can get in the vault. One child spins and wins a pen and a pencil. The next child spins and wins a pen and pencil. The other child wants nothing to do with the wheel. So I am up. I spin it and have 2 fleeting thoughts of "I'll never hit it-I'm not that lucky" and "wouldn't it be great to get the cash vault". The wheel stops on cash vault! Cool! I just heard someone say they got $136 bucks. My husband is exited and takes his spin. Cash vault for him, too! I say to the attendant "do we really get cash or is there some other catch?" Yes, I am ever the skeptic. He assures me we get actual money.

I am a bit in shock and trying to act cool because I am not the type to do silly things like this. Then the guy right in front of me comes out and they count his money and he got $186. Incredible. The attendants are giving me pointers and telling me how others have done it which I find intriguing because don't they want to me to lose? So, I step in and do exactly how I've seen others catch the money. I am thinking I am not doing so well but I stay on course. I step out and they start counting. $167!!!!! I am quite happy.

My husband goes in and we are watching him. He steps out after his 20 seconds and we are waiting for the tally. $211!!! Holy cow! Unbelievable. So we walk inside the bank and the teller gives us $167 + $211. $378!!! In 40 seconds! And all because of a free lunch! What a great deal.

I'd like to point out that this was not our doing. GOD had his hand in this at every step. We were almost home. We ended up staying. We spun a wheel and God had it land in the right spot. We just stood there while money dropped from HIM. We do not take any of the credit for this. God is our provider. He provided us with food, family time, fun and funds yesterday. We are so blessed. And we are so grateful and give God the glory.

Oh and by the way, we got home and the phone rang--twice. All three of our children had entered coloring contests at a local natural foods store and 2 had won prizes! So we went to pick them up and in addition to the prizes, they gave the third child something so she wouldn't feel left out and they gave us some additional free cookies and juice. I told you God is good and He is the ultimate gift giver.

How to be a little "greener"

So, maybe you are not a big recycler. I try to be. Although there are some times when I do throw things away and it does cause me some guilt but you do what you gotta do, right? Here are some tips on how to be a little bit more Earth Friendly.

1. Start Recycling by putting your empty plastic water bottles and newspapers in your bin and taking it out to the curb on trash day. Nice and clean recycling:) If you don't have a bin, use an old laundry basket, a paper bag or a cardboard box.

2. Or Stop using plastic water bottles and buy a metal water bottle. Or carry a cup around in your car and take it in places to get water. Or bring a cup to places you go to often and leave it there to use another day.

3. Cut back to only 1 or 2 magazine subscriptions (it will also save you $) and when you are done donate them (our public library takes them) for someone else to read.

4. Get only the Sunday newspaper--do you really read them everyday?

5. Get rid of your credit cards (sound financial advice, too)--it will cut back on the amount of junk mail you receive.

6. Eat more fresh food. Oh, and don't use produce bags.

7. STOP buying individually wrapped or packaged food products! Yes it's easier but Wow! what a waste. No more snack size anything. Buy some Tupperware type containers, fill them from a big bag or box, wash and REUSE them!

8. Cut back on fast food restaurants and coffee places! So much packaging. And how many people bring home the Starbucks cup, wash it and recycle it?Hmm?

9. Buy and use reusable grocery bags. Or take old ones back to the store to reuse. One day just watch for a minutes at the grocery store to see how many plastic bags are used! It's crazy. Especially since they only put about 3 items in a bag and then sometimes double bag items!

So, these are relatively easy things to do. Try one or all of them. Let me know how it goes. Let's all do our part.

I am a Coupon Clipper!

My husband may not think so but I am a pretty thrifty shopper. I have a system and a pretty good memory so I usually get the cheapest prices on the things I buy.



You could say that my problem is that I buy organic. The problem part of that is that it can be much more expensive. The great part of it is that I feel so much better about giving my family pesticide free, hormone free, antibiotic free, preservative free, dye free, chemical free and earth friendly products. I have read too many articles and seen too many programs to feel comfortable giving them the mainstream cheap stuff.



So how do I do it? I shop at 6 different stores. Yes, it takes a little time and a little extra gas. I know, I know...the time I could save and the money I could save on the gas, blah, blah. You decide what is right for you. I start at the farthest away store and work my way back so I'm not zigzagging all over the place.



I shop on Wednesday because 3 of the stores have double ad day on Wednesdays. So I get the specials from both weeks and that way if there's a really good sale I can buy it twice. So the night before I check out the ads online and the ads that come in the mail and figure out if I need to go to all 6 stores. I also print coupons from many different websites so I save even more. I get coupon booklets from several of the stores, I clip them from the paper and I sign up for them from websites.


I start out early because one of the stores has day old bakery items on clearance and you have to get there early to get them. Plus it's not as crowded so we can get in and out. I try to do it all in one day because the more I go the more I spend. We are members at Costco so I do buy some things in bulk. Actually not as much as you would think. You have to really check your prices because sometimes it isn't that much of a deal. Plus just because it's organic doesn't mean it's good for you (for example, organic pop tarts are quite tasty but they still are sugar!).

I also know where every clearance area is in my stores. I make sure i go to them each time I shop. I look on the shelves for clearance tags also. if it's organic and I will use it, I buy it. Organic is more and so if it's on sale I will buy it and decent amount of it. One day I found Organic canned Peas for 50 cents so I bought all that was out-15 cans. it was a great deal. I would have been totally happy with that but I got to the cash register and they were 33 cents! At that price you know I would have bought more if the store had them. We ate them and now we haven't had them for a while. But that is okay, something else will become on sale and I'll scoop that up.


When something is a really good deal and I can store it, I do purchase a lot of it. You spend more in the moment but then later it saves you. I also have been freezing a lot of stuff to keep for a while--bread, store bought baked goods, chocolate chips, meats, etc. And we have been eating more fresh food and only what I know we will eat. I'll tell you what--we throw away so much less food. We eat a lot of leftovers and we may eat the same vegetable several times in one week but it's just food. As long as we're full and eat good for you stuff, we're okay.

Here are a few of my favorite places on the web for coupons:
Target - you can only use them there
Heb - you can use the coupons from their website at other stores
Mambo Sprouts-for natural and organic foods
Horizon, Organic Valley, Seventh Generation- you have to sign up for them

Happy Shopping!

I love to play games!

I am a game player. My husband is not-- but that's another story:) I don't know if it's because I'm so competitive but I am sure that is a part of it.

I will play most any game but right now I'm a bit obsessed with Scrabble on the computer. I like it because I play by myself whenever I want. There's no distraction of anyone else and how they play. I am only satisfied with a score of over 400 at this point. If I don't get over 400 I will play until I do. So there is a scary factor to it. I can spend hours playing which is not good. I could be doing lots of other things.

When my mother visits, we play lots of Upwards. It is fun but it takes hours. I like the challenge of it and I like spending the time with my mom that way.

With my kids, it's lots of Life and My Littlest Pet Shop Monopoly. I have to say that Monopoly is not my kind of game. It takes too long---especially with a 9 and a 6 year old. Yuck! They also like to play these games over and over. So how many times can a person get excited about this stuff. We play Connect 4 and Battleship too. We also play card games, although they don't like my favorite-Uno. They don't like to play because I must admit I usually win.

So maybe that's the problem --I like too play the games I know I can win. Or maybe I'm just a good game player. So I guess Scrabble on the computer might be my best choice after all!!!

Summertime!

I talked about this a little the other day--how it is summer weather here already. I laugh when a commercial comes on saying something like "Spring has arrived..." Spring has come and gone. We are already deeply entrenched in summer planning.

Since we homeschool, summer is a bit different for us. We don't have any of those end of the school year field trips, parties or graduations in May. But we are affected by those things because we have friends who go to public school and we hear all about these events. Plus parks are more crowded, kids start appearing at the library in the mornings, friends are busy.

Summer really starts for us when our church starts serious preparation for Vacation Bible School! Our church always has it the week after public school ends so we kick off the summer with it. My kids love VBS. They like to paint the sets, they like to help me organize the snack, they LOVE!!!! to sing the songs (especially before the other kids know them!), they shop with me, they help me in the kitchen. They just think it's great all the way around! They love to feel a part of-like they helped. Especially my 9 year old--just tell her we're going to church and she's says "when? what for? how can I help?" She's so sweet!

For that one week it is amazingly easy to get them out of the house! They are bright eyed and bushy tailed at 7am and actually functioning at 7:30am when we leave the house each morning. Even the one day when I need to be there at 7am, they are ready to go! It's incredible that they are so motivated for one week!

So we started about a month ago with serious preparation. Now we are in the full swing of things! We are planning meals, planning decorations, inputting info on the computer, trying to get donors, coordinating with people AND OF COURSE, we are listening to music! Even my 3 year old and I know know the words to the music! On a side note, what a great way to memorize scripture! It's how I learned John 3:16 and how I am now finally learning the fruits of the Spirit.

God is Good!!! He is so good to me!

Being a mother is...

Being a mother is...

Incredibly challenging.
Life changing.
Tiring.
Exciting.
Surprising.
Hard work.
Entertaining.
Rewarding.
Did I say exhausting?
Fun and funny!
Exasperating.
Awesome!

But the thing that I get the most of out of being a mom is the chance to see myself in my children . This can be a good thing and a bad thing.

I'm a yeller so guess what? So are my children.
I'm a whiner so they whine.
I can act a martyr so they act like martyrs sometimes.
I am not the best housekeeper so their rooms are a constant battle.
I am not so disciplined so they balk at being disciplined.
I can be judgemental so I hear judgements come out of their mouths.

But...
I love to read and sometimes we have to tell them to stop reading.
I love animals and so do they.
I have compassion for animals and people and they are very giving and have tender hearts.
I volunteer and help out at church and they love to help also.
I love babies and so they are so sweet with younger kids.

Being a mom is a mixture of happiness and pain, giving and receiving, crying and laughing.
I wouldn't trade a minute of the journey and am looking forward to the adventure that will come in the future.

Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her-Proverbs 31:28

Train a child in a way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it-Proverbs 22:6

90 degrees on May 4th!

This is what you get for choosing to live in Texas! And don't get me wrong I love warm weather. I would much rather be warm than cold any day but it seems like we went from cold to hot in seconds flat. No Spring. We have 2 seasons here in Austin--Summer and Winter--nothing in between. I am complaining but not really. There is one problem though...

I live with a man who is always hot. No matter what he's hot. In the winter with the heat on he walks around in shorts and in the summer with the air conditioning on he walks around in his undershorts. Meanwhile I have a sweater and socks on over my regular outfit-heat on or air on. It's a battle.

It's beautiful and sunny. I love the sunshine. I love the day light from 6:30am until 8pm. I might as well go to sleep at 8pm because all I do is sit around when it's dark. I can't seem to do anything when it's dark.

So, you see, even though I talk about it being hot already, I still love Austin as much as I did the day I stepped foot off the plane in March of 1992. I definitely wouldn't live any place else in Texas and you be hard pressed to get me to live any where that there is not any less than 6 months of summer! So I'm going to get the sunscreen, some lemonade and a fan because I'm staying right here!

Where did the day go?

Here I am at the computer wondering "where did the time go?". I even got up early this morning to spend some time with the Lord before my day started and I thought that would make the day flow smoother and we would get everything done.

One thing lead to another and we have gotten a bunch of stuff done but it's never enough. We probably did more school than we usually do but Math took forever today! I think we could have done another subject had the math been a more manageable amount of time. I guess I learned that it's better to accompany them in doing their math rather than having them do it alone while I'm trying to do laundry!

It's days like these when I realize how much I have on my plate. I haven't really wasted any time today. You know-- I haven't played multiple games of scrabble on the computer, I haven't talked to anyone on the phone, I didn't lay in bed until 7am, I didn't go running around on errands. We did important things--school, chores, laundry, meals, showers & baths. I even cleaned a tub, a sink and a mirror plus cleaned up a small "accident". So in reality I did do a lot. It's all in how you look at it I guess.

Thanks for helping me get some perspective!

Today is the day the Lord has made: rejoice and be glad in it!-Psalm 118:24

20 Years!

Last week I celebrated my 20 year anniversary in AA! Wow! Even I am impressed.

It was kind of nerve wracking, though. I expect a lot out of myself because of that! I think I should be so much more serene than I am. All my defects of character should be under control by now. I think this might be the year I really have to work on accepting myself. Especially since both my sponsees are working on the same thing. God knows what he is doing. He put me with these women and these women with me so we can all work on it together.

Of course, I do realize that I did not string all these days together myself-God has done for me what I cannot do for myself. If I was in control, I'd probably be dead, gone crazy or be drinking again. God is so good. The only thing I did was I didn't pick up a drink. Really, because I didn't go to meetings regularly, I didn't have a sponsor all the time and I wasn't always rigorously honest or work the steps. So to God I have to give all the glory!

I am so grateful for my sobriety. I wouldn't have all the blessings I have if I wasn't sober. It's not easy all the time but a drink wouldn't help me at all. It might possibly feel good for a minute but the problems would all still be there tomorrow plus I would have to deal with the wreckage of that drink. So right now I am trying to live life on life's terms and to realize everyone has problems and the best way for me to deal with mine is straight on...AND SOBER!

Love this Song!!!

This is so beautiful!!!!

Hallelujah written by Leonard Cohen
Sung by various artists-here are a few of them.

Check this version out by Allison Crowe
http://music.allisoncrowe.com/track/hallelujah


Or watch k.d. Lang sing it on You Tube
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P_NpxTWbovE


This is for my kids! Listen to Jason Castro's version!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=erjF2uxYcbo&feature=related



Words & Lyrics written by Leonard Cohen
"Hallelujah"

Now I've heard there was a secret chord
That David played, and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for music, do you?
It goes like this
The fourth, the fifth
The minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you
She tied you
To a kitchen chair
She broke your throne, and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah

Baby I have been here before
I know this room, I've walked this floor
I used to live alone before I knew you.
I've seen your flag on the marble arch
Love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

There was a time you let me know
What's really going on below
But now you never show it to me, do you?
And remember when I moved in you
The holy dove was moving too
And every breath we drew was Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

You say I took the name in vain
I don't even know the name
But if I did, well really, what's it to you?
There's a blaze of light
In every word
It doesn't matter which you heard
The holy or the broken Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

I did my best, it wasn't much
I couldn't feel, so I tried to touch
I've told the truth, I didn't come to fool you
And even though
It all went wrong
I'll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Mama's doing something...

How many times have you heard yourself say that? Or something very similar. Daddy has to go to work, just a minute, give me a second, after this, in five minutes...It is a bummer but sometimes we can't stop what we're doing and our kids have to wait.

It's a tough call. I feel guilty sometimes-especially the times that I am not really doing anything important. But there are other times when I'm doing something I don't want to stop-like eating a warm meal (notice I didn't say hot!). And then there are actually times where I am doing something I can't stop-like going to the restroom! It seems like they always need you when you are busy.

There are also the even tougher times when you have to decide which child to take care of first. Like yesterday, when one child was closing the garage door with the back hatch of my car open and another child was crying because her brother slammed her finger in the door! Well, maybe that's slightly different... But you know what I mean. The hurt one had to wait for sympathy and loving while I rescued my car.

So, we just do our best. They will survive, right? I am just starting to read a book called "The Power of a Praying Parent" by Stormie Omartian. She suggests we pray for our kids-the concerns of the moment, for the future AND against the effects of past events. I like that. I think it's comforting to know that god can and will protect our children-even if it's protecting against our own actions.


Here's a Bible passage that might help.

O LORD, hear my prayer,
listen to my cry for mercy;
in your faithfulness and righteousness
come to my relief. Psalm 143:1

Here's another prayer that might help.

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can
and the wisdom to know the difference.

Here's a song that might help.

Jesus loves the little children-all the children of the world...

The New Year

Happy New Year! It's 2010!

What a great time to think about the year ahead! What do you want to accomplish this year? What changes would you like to make in yourself? What would you like your life to look like? In what area of your life would you like to grow? It can be overwhelming. Don't get discouraged already!

I am not making any resolutions but I sure would like to make some changes. I am hoping I can take small steps, with God's help, of course, in becoming more of what Jesus wants me to be.

1. Love my neighbor as myself-so I want to love myself more so I can love my neighbor more
2. Forgive so that I may be forgiven-forgive myself so that I can forgive others more easily
3. Do God's will-when I do my will it RARELY works out
4. Be grateful-remember to thank God for all that I have
5. Accept help-ask for help and LET others help

And then there are the littler things...

1. Get organized! Here is where it gets overwhelming-papers, papers, papers...
2. Get healthy-exercise more and eat less sugar
3. Be a better housekeeper-need I say more?
4. Use my time more wisely-less video games, more action

I kind of don't like putting it all down because it looks a little daunting but if I remember I don't have to do it all right this second it's more manageable.

I wish you a happy, healthy, peaceful New Year. May you feel God's presence in all you do.