Crying children...

I was going to write but I have crying and screaming children in the background. Do you feel sorry for me? No, I didn't think so. I wish I knew how not to react...

Wow! Time Flies!

So, it's been a LONG time since I posted. To tell you the truth, it wasn't that I didn't think I had anything to say, I just lost my desire. Let me tell you about it.

I really enjoy writing. I feel like I have a lot to say. I was really finding this quite the excellent outlet for my thoughts. I also found that I was able to share them without any judgement which is pretty remarkable because in my mind I still find that I think I know the right way to do everything:) I am generally a pretty reserved and keep to myself. But I long to be an extrovert who is always bubbly and positive like many of my friends--who know who they are! I secretly-or maybe not so secretly- love to be in the limelight and have all the attention on me. So I think this kind of fulfilled my inner Celebrity!

The problem is the little voice in my head that is constantly berating everything I do. This happens on a regular basis. I start doing something good for myself or something that I like or I relax a little bit and WHAM! the loud, little voice has got my attention. I start questioning and then the next thing you know I don't want to do whatever the good thing was. In AA, we would call that voice our disease. I think Beth Moore (my favorite Bible study author and teacher) would call it the Devil or the Enemy. Others may call it the voice of doubt. Whatever it is, I listen to it too much.

So, what can I do about it? Pray to God is number one and ask Him to remove my doubts and the negative thoughts I have. I can get support from other people who go through this. I can feel the fear and do it anyway. The other thing that I think would help is to have a routine or discipline at least with writing, so that at some point it becomes wrote (literally and figuratively).

I want to thank Mike Robertson for giving my the push that I needed to write here again. Thanks for taking the time to encourage me. I appreciate your positive words.